Because of You
by SweetComplications
Summary: Joey is afraid to tell Mai his true feelings. He looks back how he used to be a bully to the man he is today.   A depressing Father's Day one-shot thingy.


My first songfic ever. I'll admit I'm kind of nervous about posting this up but Father's Day is approaching and I wanted to write something for Joey, the goofball we all love. I want to dedicate this songfic to Saradarkotter as she encouraged me about writing then posting this songfic. Thank you so much!

_Edit 1: I edited this out after finally having the time to take Demented Insane Spirit's advice. I have to admit that it does sound better using that, this and then better than dat, dis and den. I think the ya still gives the essence of Joey having the Brooklyn accent he has in the dubbed version._

Disclaimer: I do not own Joey Wheeler or Yu-Gi-Oh! They belong to Kazuki Takahashi. I also do not own Because of You by Kelly Clarkson.

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><p><em>I will not make the same mistakes that you did<em>

_I will not let myself _

_Cause my heart so much misery_

_I will not break the way that you did_

_You fell so hard _

_I've learned the hard way _

_To never let it get that far_

I met this wonderful girl Dad. Her name is Mai Valentine and she's so beautiful. Her hair is like gold silk, framing that face of hers. Mai's eyes are a rare sight too. They're a pretty shade of purple color that reminds me of orchids that Ma used to buy. She knows what exactly to say to ya even when ya think ya don't need it. Ya know Dad, I'm afraid to tell her that I love her. I was afraid to tell her before that she was a friend to me but how can I when I grew up with ya? Look at what the divorce did to ya and our family.

_Because of you _

_I never stray too far from the sidewalk_

_Because of you_

_I learned to play it on the safe side so I don't get hurt_

_Because of you _

_I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me_

_Because of you_

_I am afraid_

For the longest time, I hung out with people who didn't show compassion to others. I was afraid to let them in and see the real me. That's why I never looked for the real friends, ones that would care about the real me. I didn't know how to trust someone new, except for Tristan.

_I lose my way_

_And it's not too long before you point it out_

_I cannot cry_

_Because I know that's weakness in your eyes_

_I'm forced to fake_

_A smile, a laugh everyday of my life_

_My heart can't possibly break_

_When it wasn't even whole to start with_

I was on a dark path, that ya seemed to notice and comment once in awhile but ya would just go back to your old ways of not caring. I wanted to cry sometimes but I knew ya tell me that men don't cry. So I hid my pain by replacing it with others, watching them suffer for me. I watched them beg for me to stop but I never did. How could someone who didn't get compassion from their father show others it? It took my new friends to teach me, not ya.

_Because of you _

_I never stray too far from the sidewalk_

_Because of you_

_I learned to play it on the safe side so I don't get hurt_

_Because of you _

_I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me_

_Because of you_

_I am afraid_

It was hard being alone at first, but then I got used to it. Ya seemed to be ok being alone so I thought I could be too.

_I watched you die _

_I heard you cry every night in your sleep_

_I was so young _

_You should have known better than to lean on me_

_You never thought of anyone else_

_You just saw your pain_

_And now I cry in the middle of the night_

_For the same damn thing_

I remember after the divorce ya fell into a deep depression, relying on alcohol and other stuff to hide your pain. Ya used to ask me to give ya a hug as ya cried, askin' why did ya ever stop loving Ma and how ya wish ya could take it all back. Ya know, I was sufferin' too. She and Serenity were taken out of my life too, leaving me to be raised by ya. But ya only saw how much ya were hurting, forgetting about me. To this day, I still cry at night over everything I went through with ya. I never told my friends about me cryin'.

_Because of you _

_I never stray too far from the sidewalk_

_Because of you_

_I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt_

_Because of you_

_I try my hardest just to forget everything_

_Because of you _

_I don't know how to let anyone else in_

_Because of you _

_I am ashamed of my life because it's empty_

_Because of you _

_I am afraid_

For awhile, I felt like I was empty inside and I was ashamed to tell anyone that. But now, my friends are teaching me that it's ok to trust people now and to show compassion even to jerks that don't really deserve it like Kaiba. Slowly but surely my friend Tea is guiding me to admit my feelings to Mai, something ya could never do for me. They're healing the scars on my heart that ya left, because ya were afraid to show love.

_Because of you_

But Dad, please don't forget. I still love ya.

_Because of you_

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><p>I hope you enjoyed this songfic as I had fun writing it. Have a good father's day with the person that you see as a great male figure in your life.<p> 


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